Thursday, February 11, 2010

Diplomatic Endowments

A distinguished Pakistani diplomat has allegedly been denied agrément (accreditation) to serve as Ambassador to the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia (and possibly any other Arab-speaking country) because his name, Akbar Zeb, equates to "Biggest Dick" in Arabic. Ambassador Zeb is a firm, well rounded professional who has an impressive portfolio. He's quite a big shot in the diplomatic spheres where he has hard decisions to take but is well known for his oral skills - he was the head of the Pakistani embassy in South Africa and before that, at the pinnacle of his foreign affairs career, he served in Washington and New Delhi. His Excellency is currently the High Commissioner for Pakistan in Canada. In his limp response to the news, Ambassador Zeb dismissed the story as rumours but sources close to him say that it was a massive task to get to grips with and that he feels rear-ended by the situation. His legal representatives expressed his desire to penetrate the cell responsible for this defamation. The reaction from the public was slow but is quickly gaining momentum and is now said to be reaching its climax on the internet websites. Saudi officials kept a stiff upper lip on the issue, however insiders said that senior government persons were in deep thought over the debacle and would likely engage in fluid discussions with Pakistan to avoid any potential missile strike on the tightly guarded Kingdom as a result of the diplomatic incident. It would seem that both parties are eager that a solution to the dilemma comes quickly. Never in the annals of the history between the two nations has there been such an embarrassing let down. At the end of it all, the matter seems to have been a huge cockup in the foreign relations.


sediqa said...

Ha. I heard about this through a friend. I feel sorry for the guy. I wonder if this will force him to change his name.

Wafa' said...

the ignorance of the country compares nothing to his skills, so i guess it's these countries' mistake for not having him as an embassador. plus there are hundereds of arab names which are silly and vulgar, so ??

Anonymous said...

DD - you really know how to swing words!
This story reminds me of a guy named Koos working in a predominantly Arab environment - the girls in the office would be shocked everytime his name was mentioned (incidently its the ummm female part of the anatomy)


Riverwolf, said...

Too funny--and cleverly written!