False Prophets

I believed the false prophets of your poetic words.
I worshipped the fake religion of your heart.
The prayer beads of your lips repeated my salvation,
and yet they have betrayed me.
Your holy scriptures have been altered.
And even though you healed the sick and cured the blind…
You have left me faithless.

Voyages of Discovery

I knew it was going to be an ‘interesting’ night when at close to 11:00pm, I heard the words… so ladies how's about a ‘memory maker’?

We’re hot-blooded, virile women and we have needs or at least a need for experimentation…

So off we went to a rather “reputable” establishment, which celebrates the male form in all its glory (of course when u pay for haram stuff with interest money – its acceptable) so even though the entrance fee was steep (over 100 a pop) it was justified.

Some blame the argile; I blame myself for calling my friend’s bluff. So up the stairs and into the room we went, we held our breath… as we walked through the open door that Adonis in hot pants had opened and into the annual Adonis in hot pants conference.

At this point I finally understand why Eve was tempted by the snake….

The 6 of us took a booth and watched (sometimes from behind our hands, over our eyes) the guys’ bump, grind, gyrate, caress (by which time we were hyperventilating).

Who ever thought you could mass produce the feeling that you’re the only girl in the room the guy sees (but apparently you can) and the blushing is contagious!!!

The room wasn’t badly decorated or tacky and the menu was pretty good, but can you actually eat at this sort of joint? We settled on funky looking strawberry daiquiris all around and debated whether we should buy a table dance? After considering the hefty fee and watching one from across the room, we decided it wasn’t elegant for ladies to behave in that manner so, lots of money paid and 30 minutes later after the very good daiquiris (which could’ve been complemented by the very good bodies we saw), we were on our way …

One more night to tell our kids about!

Women of Jhodpur

(Source: www.flickr.com/photos/51716334@N00/2510418267/)

Hasad, Envy and Evil-Eye Syndrome

I bumped into a friend the other day and chatting away about all sorts of things, I asked, as I often do, “so tell me stories … ”. To which he replied, oh I’ve got some tales to tell that are definitely for your diary (yanee blog). I was surprised cos I didn’t think he knew wat a “diary” (yanee blog) was or that I blogged!!! But then again, he does often see me with my eyes glued to my laptop!

Story 1

In a village in Saudi Arabia, a man was blessed with the unfortunate gift of having the evil eye - it was totally unintentional and without any premeditation, but when he would look at a person, even his sons and even when he looked at them with love, misfortune would befall them. He tired of these ill effects he had on people and the towns-people feared him. Frustrated by this problem, he sought counsel with some tribal leaders and religious wise men. Their suggestion, though they weren't sure it would work, was rather strange but he was willing to give it a shot. They said he should go thru all the rituals of death, having ghusl(cleansing), being wrapped in the kafn (burial shrouds) and having janazah salah (burial prayer) read for him, after that, he would be rid of this wretched evil eye (ain). As his janazah was being read, a traveller happened to pass thru the village and stopped to fill petrol at the nearby garage. Upon seeing the janaza being read, he decided to do the good muslim duty and join the folks. While standing in prayer, he noticed the "dead" man winking at him. scared shitless, he ran got the hell out of that village. A year later, he happened upon the self same village and bumped into dead man walking, but didn't recognise him.... dead man looked at him and said, "i've seen u somewhere before.... have u been here before" and so the traveller related his previous “winked at by the dead” experience, to which dead man walking laughed so hard, his belly shook beneath his thobe and he confessed to being the formerly deceased and explained that the ritual in fact worked. This is the story, as told by the traveller and retold and retold until it reached desert demons ears.

Story 2

Friend story teller swears this one is true and that he actually witnessed it and knows the owner of the evil eye! (Apparently he steers clear of him).

Tradition on special occasions in bedoiun tribes are such that the men sit around a huge (massive) tray laden with rice and a whole lamb (or sometimes baby camel). Each person eats from wat is in front of him on the tray and everyone always gets their fill. It happened one day that an Egyptian was an invited guest to the event. Apparently he was oblivious to the fact that it is extremely impolite to reach beyond the food that is in front of you. There he sat, gluttonously stretching across, picking away and digging at the most succulent meat. The tribal elders were disturbed by this behaviour and felt it a great insult. Amongst them was one who was known for having the power of Hasad (envy) and Ain (evil eye). Raising a brow, he warned that he would teach the uncultured visitor a lesson! Minutes later the Egyptian was being rushed to hospital, with blood gushing from his mouth. He had bit his own tongue so hard that it almost fell off! Lesson to be learnt, always abide by the etiquette of the people and places you are visiting and leave your bad habits at home, or pay the price!

Story 3

Then of course there are the ‘pamphlets of the messiah'. You know those! The cure-all doctors!. Intriguing Mama Munna from the mountain Khumi, who heals everything from erectile dysfunction to evil mother-in-laws and even gets you the lotto numbers – and asthma is paired off with insanity, while she exorcises your ghosts and bottles your jinns and she even brings back lost lovers and guarantees results (or your money back)! Wonder if Mama Munna's magic miracle formula works so well, why isn't she basking in the sun on her own luxurious yacht, with an ED-free hunk and a couple of million to spare?

Now if only Mamma Munna or Mr Hasad Eyes could rub the lamp or evil eye this world gone mad and instead of guaranteeing the true love or erect penis, rather guarantee peace and an end to the massacre of children!

أنا مع الإرهاب I Am With Terrorism

I've expressed my love for Nizar Qabbani's poetry before. Known as the women's poet, he is renowned for his poems about women, to women and about love.
But I fell in love with Nizar Qabbani when at the beginning of the second Intifada I found this poem of his, written in the 1990's. It is a little long but it is amazing how it still rings true today. Lo, how beautiful terrorism is!

Nizar Qabbani: "I am with Terrorism"

I am with terrorism

We are accused of terrorism:
if we defended rose and woman
and the mighty verse ...
and the blueness of sky ...

A dominion .. nothing left therein...
No water, no air ..
No tent, no camel,
and not even dark Arabica coffee!!

We are accused of terrorism:
if we defended with guts
the hair of Balqis
and the lips of Maysun
if we defended Hind, and Da`d
Lubna and Rabab ..
and the stream of Kohl
coming down from their lashes like the verses of revelation.

You will not find with me
a secret poem
or a secret logos
or books I put behind doors.
I do not even have one poem
walking down the street, wearing veil.

We are accused of terrorism:
if we wrote about the ruins of a homeland
torn, weak ...
a homeland with no address
and an nation with no names

I seek the remnants of a homeland
none of its grand poems is left
except the bemoans of Khansa.

I seek a dominion in whose horizons
no freedom can be found
red .. blue or yellow.

A homeland forbidding us from bying a newspaper
or listening to the news.
A dominion wherein birds are forbidden
from chirping.
A homeland wherein, out of terror [ru`b],
its writers got accustomed to write about
nothing.
A homeland, in the likeness of poetry in our lands:

It is vain talk,
no rhythm,
imported
Ajam, with a crooked face and tongue:
No beginning
No end
No relation with people's worry
mother earth
and the crisis of man.

A dominion ...
going to peace talks
with no honor
no shoe.

A homeland,
men peed in their pants ..
women are those left to defend honor.

Salt in our eyes
Salt in our lips
Salt in our words
Can the self carry such dryness?

An inheritance we got from the barren Qahtan?
In our nation, no Mu`awiya, and no Abu Sufiyan
No one is left to say "NO"
and face the quitters
they gave up our houses, our bread and our [olive] oil.
They transformed our bright history into a mediocre store.

In our lives, no poem is left,
since we lost our chastity in the bed of the Sultan.

They got accustomed to us, the humbled.
What is left to man
when all that remains
is disgrace.

I seek in the books of history
Ussamah ibn al-Munqith
Uqba ibn Nafi`
Omar, and Hamzah
and Khalid, driving his flocks conquering the Shem.
I seek a Mu`tasim Billah
Saving women from the cruelty of rape
and the fire.

I seek latter days men
All I can see is frightened cats
Scared for their own souls, from
the sultanship of mice.

Is this an overwhelming national blindness?
Are we blind to colors?

We are accused of terrorism
If we refuse to die
with Israel's bulldozers
tearing our land
tearing our history
tearing our Evangelium
tearing our Koran
tearing the graves of our prophets

If this was our sin,
then, lo, how beautiful terrorism is?

We are accused of terrorism
if we refused to be effaced
by the hands of the Mogul, Jews and Barbarians
if we throw a stone
at the glass of the the Security Council
after the Ceasar of Ceasars got a hold of it.

We are accused of terrorism
if we refuse to negociate with the wolf
and shake the hand with a whore

America
Against the cultures of the peoples
with no culture
Against the civilizations of the civilized
with no civilization

America
a mighty edifice
with no walls!

We are accused of terrorism:
if we refused an era
America became
the foolish, the rich, the mighty
translated, sworn
in Hebrew.

We are accused of terrorism:
if we throw a rose
to Jerusalem
to al-Khalil
to Ghazza
to an-Nasirah
if we took bread and water
to beleaguered Troy.

We are accused of terrorism:
if we raised our voices against
the regionalists of our leaders.

All changed their rides:
from Unionists
to Brokers.

If we committed the heinous crime of culture
if we revolted against the orders of the grand caliph
and the seat of the caliphate

If we read jurisprudence or politics
If we recalled God
and read verse al-Fat-h
[that Chapter of Conquest].
If we listened to the Friday sermon
then we are well-established in the art of terrorism

We are accused of terrorism
if we defended land
and the honor of dust
if we revolted against the rape of people
and our rape
if we defended the last palm trees in our desert
the last stars in our sky
the last syllabi of our names
the last milk in our mothers' bosoms

if this was our sin

how beautiful is terrorism.

I am with terrorism
if it is able to save me
from the immigrants from Russia
Romania, Hungaria, and Poland

They settled in Palestine
set foot on our shoulders
to steal the minarets of al-Quds
and the door of Aqsa
to steal the arabesques
and the domes.

I am with terrorism
if it will free the Messiah, Jesus of Nazareth,
and the virgin, Meriam Betula
and the holy city
from the ambassadors of death and desolation

Yesteryear
The nationalist street was fervent
like a wild horse.
The rivers were abundant with the spirit of youth.

But after Olso,
we no longer had teeth:
we are now a blind and lost people.

We are accused of terrorism:
if we defended with full-force
our poetic heritage
our national wall
our rosy civilization
the culture of flutes in our mountains
and the mirrors displaying blackened eyes.

We are accused of terrorism:
if we defended what we wrote
El azure of our sea
and the aroma of ink
if we defended the freedom of the word
and the holiness of books

I am with terrorism
if it is able to free a people
from tyrants and tyranny
if it is able to save man from the cruelty of man
to return lemon, olive tree, and bird to the South of Lebanon
and the smile back to Golan

I am with terrorism
if it will save me
from the Caesar of Yehuda
and the Caesar of Rome

I am with terrorism
as long as this new world order
is shared
between America and Israel
half-half

I am with terrorism
with all my poetry
with all my words
and all my teeth
as long as this new world
is in the hands of a butcher.

I am with terrorism
if the U.S. Senate
enacts judgment
decrees reward and punishment

I am with Irhab [terrorism]
as long this new world order
hates the smell of A`rab.

I am with terrorism
as long as the new world order
wants to slaughter my off-spring.
and send them to dogs.

For all this
I raise my voice high:

I am with terrorism

I am with terrorism

I am with terrorism ...

Nizar Qabbani
London, 15 Nisan (April) 1997.

December 2009: Finale!

November 2009: Tunisian

(Source: Travel-images.com)

October 2009: Arabian Purebred

(Source: flickr.com)

September 2009: For Gaza

(Souce: deviantart.com)